My how dating has changed

October 18, 2015

There are a lot of reasons why dating is different for me this time around. The biggest difference is that I am now a mom. Letting someone into my life carries a lot more consequences than before. There are also those minor details around being older, having a body of someone that has carried two children, having little to no online datingtime, etc.

In addition to the changes in my life, how dating happens and how people meet has changed immensely. The majority of people participate in online dating. There are so many sites/apps out there it is very overwhelming. There was a big learning curve in this area for me. What pictures do you use? What do you say about yourself? You want to share but not too much. Is it witty? Is it too sarcastic?

Once you get past all of the profile stuff, what happens when you actually come across someone you want to meet? Where do you meet? What do you wear? Did you remember to give someone his contact info and tell them where you are going (for safety)?

Having a child with a disability adds yet another layer of complication. When do you tell someone? How do you tell someone?

I started dating again about a year ago. I’ve tried numerous dating sites. And been on many “meet and greets” (a quick drink or cup of coffee to see if it should progress to a first date) and dates. There have been some great ones and some awful ones. Most fall somewhere in the middle. I have yet to meet anyone I’m comfortable enough with to introduce them to the kids.

I think the hardest part of dating later in life is baggage. My baggage AND their baggage. I have a hard time trusting anyone. I’ve been hurt, cheated on, lied to, etc. And most guys out there looking to date have dealt with similar situations.

When I put it all together in a list like this it seems hopeless. Yet I still try. I try because I miss it. Because I get lonely. I have a lot of amazing friends and that helps, but it isn’t the same.online4

To all of you single moms and dads out there…. Good luck. Don’t lose hope. There are good guys and gals out there.


One comment

  1. I completely understand… there are a lot of losers out here, it is very scary dating. For my two cents always keep your guards up if there are signs do not ignore them because if you do they will just build up and become an even bigger headache for you. I would say meet a guy in an environment that you are comfortable in. In the beginning I would not just spew out personal information about yourself, after you have went on several dates and really got to know one another you will know when the time is right to tell you personal private information. Just an FYI for you there are services available for you and special needs children’s. One is Healthy Children and Youth this program provides personal care services for your special needs children to assist with bathing, dressing and grooming and any chore work you will need in your home and on those days you need some time free time for your self a chore worker can be at you home watching over you special needs child to give you a piece of mind. Utilize anything that is available for you and your current situation. Good Luck on dating.

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